Prof Life

This parody (written by Greg Crowther) is sung to the tune of "Pop Life" (written and performed by Prince).

Teaching during a pandemic is tough!

What’s the matter with your class?
Is it less than a half-full glass?
Do you miss pipetting in labs?
Were your favorite online simulations
All programmed in Flash?

Tell me, what’s the matter with your screen?
Does your skin have a pallid sheen?
What do these captions even mean?
And you’ve lost your only student
Whose face could still be seen!

CHORUS:
Prof life --
When you’re lecturing from your bed...
Prof life --
...It’s the lowest form of higher ed.
Prof life --
They say we get summers off,
But here in 2021,
It’s tough to be a prof!

Tell me, how’d the student get this grade?
Are there signs of unauthorized aid?
Why, mid-sentence,
Did he switch to British slang?
The more we test them online,
The more that Chegg gets paid!

CHORUS

What’s up with your CV
As the tenure clock strikes 3?
There is not much there to see;
The achievement of keeping your kids alive
Is not peer-refereed!

CHORUS