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Insecty Things

This parody (written by Greg Crowther) is sung to the tune of "You Sexy Thing" (written by Errol Brown and Anthony Wilson and performed by Hot Chocolate).


Lyrics

CHORUS:
Insects breathe through spiracles!
They don't need lungs; they've got insecty things!
(Insecty things, yeah.)
I believe in spiracles
Since you came along with your sexy wings!

How do you do that, Mrs. Mantis?
You seem to get all the air you need.
Those tracheal tubes run through you in complicated routes;
They open into spiracles, which let air in and out.

Yesterday, I was one of the ignorant people;
Now you're educating me about anatomy....

CHORUS

How do you do that, Mr. Beetle?
You regulate the flow of air so well!
Just like a mouth, a spiracle opens and it closes;
The spiracles shut, conserving water, while the insect dozes.

Every day, you engage in respiration;
Now you're flying next to me, explaining it to me....

CHORUS

Breathe! (Through your insecty things.)
Breathe! (Though your insecty things)
I love the way you share the air! (Insecty things.)
You've got spiracles beyond compare! (Insecty things.)

Yesterday, I was one of the ignorant people;
Now you're flying close to me, explaining it to me....

CHORUS

Dig that oxygen!
Need a little more oxygen!
I think you're suffocating!
Gotta keep on ventilating!
Breathe! (Insecty things, insecty things.)
Breathe! (Insecty things, insecty things.)
Breathe! (Insecty things, insecty things.)
Breathe! (Insecty things, insecty things.)
[repeat and fade]


Comments

This is a song about gas exchange in insects. Insects do not have lungs to facilitate this process; instead, they rely on a network of tubules called tracheae which carry gases into and out of the body. At the surface of the body, these tracheae form openings known as spiracles, which can open and close in order to regulate the amount of incoming air and the degree of water loss.