Goldberg: Discovery Core A07: Comp Assign 3

Discovery Core I/CUSP 101 & 107 (Composition and Individual and Society)
The Human Place in Nature/Autumn 2007

Composition Assignment 3 (Oct. 9)

Composition Assignment 3: Revision of Personal Essay

This week you will have your first chance at doing a formal revision of a previously submitted assignment, the Personal Essay. As we have discussed, and as noted in the "Steps to Take," you should be doing an informal revision of every assignment you submit. By going through the process more explicitly, it is my hope you will become more familiar with the processes necessary to practice revision as part of your normal writing process. As Chapter 5 in the NMHH notes, revising is much more than making specific editing changes to correct errors or clarify meaning. While these are important, they come AFTER the revision, which ask the writer to RE-VIEW the entirety of the piece, starting with its overall purpose, moving to the thesis, then the organization, then the construction of paragraphs and the connections between them, and then the introduction and conclusion. Only then should students concentrate on editing, and finally, proofreading. I strongly encourage students to email or meet with me to discuss any questions you have about my comments as well as your revised thesis and organization.

Learning Outcome	Criteria: Weak	Strong	NMHH
1. Understand and effectively respond to assignments as given and seek clarification for questions about assignments when necessary.	Writing leaves out most of the required parts of the essay, including content, structure, and tone. Student does not communicate with instructor about most to any concerns or questions s/he has about the assignment, or communicates and doesn't follow up when confusion still exists.	Writing contains all of the required parts of the essay and demonstrates a deep understanding of its intent. Student gets clarification from instructor on all questions or concerns, and follows up as necessary.	2a,b,c
2. Shape well-developed paragraphs with effective transitions leading to an integrated text.	Paragraphs have multiple ideas and little internal consistency; sentences do not follow each other logically; ideas are not supported by logic and evidence. Reader cannot determine the logical connection between paragraphs.	Paragraphs contain a single idea that is developed to its natural conclusion given the scope of the topic sentence and with the proper support for assertions made. Reader follows the argument or narrative within and between paragraphs with ease.	4 b,c, d; 5f
3. Adopt appropriate and genuine voice, tone, and level of formality.	Choice of voice, tone, and level of formality creates dissonance with the reader because they do not correspond to the needs of the assignment (using humor inappropriately, using academic language in a personal essay, etc.); consistency of choice is maintained throughout.	Choice of voice, tone, and level of formality draw the reader in and enhance interest rather than distract it.	2c,d.e.f
4. Make thoughtful choices about diction (word choice) and syntax (word order); distinguish correct from captivating.	Use of wrong, inappropriate or nonexistent words creates confusion or suggests a different meaning for the reader.	Diction and syntax choices enhance interest and help clarify meaning for the reader.	5h, i; Parts 8, 9
5. Edit with care so that choices regarding grammar, punctuation, style, spelling and mechanics enhance rather than detract from the writing's meaning and effect.	Reader has trouble understanding the majority of sentences because of these errors. Inconsistencies in usage, tense, etc. cause reader to be distracted.	Reader reads through the piece without stopping to ponder meaning. Errors are minimal and non-invasive, and grammar, punctuation, etc. improves the experience of the reader.	5h, i; Parts 7, 10. 11
6. Write with precision--employ adequate details, definition, and context.	Piece communicates only surface or imprecise ideas and descriptions. Writing is abstract and non-specific with few or no details or imprecise or confusing definitions and with little or no integration to the context of the piece's argument or framework so that reader is confused about the writer's true intent.	Piece communicates the essence of the writer's intended meaning with clarity and specificity, offering details and definitions as needed within the argument or framework of the piece.
7. Develop a focused thesis that allows for appropriate depth and complexity.	Piece does not contain a thesis. Piece contains a very broad thesis with no specificity, a thesis that is unarguable, or a thesis with too many parts to be developed adequately within the space constraints of the assignment.	Thesis lays out the complexities of the argument to be developed, conveys the importance of the assertion, and restricts its scope to the space constraints of the assignment.	3b; 5d
8. Utilize clear organizational strategies to develop lines of inquiry.	Piece contains no obvious organizational strategy, bounces from point to point without making connections, and provides little or no sense of the overall direction of the argument.	Organizational strategy leads the reader through the complexities of the argument laid out by the thesis, and leads logically to a compelling conclusion.	3c; 5e
9. Value and practice genuine intellectual exploration and risk-taking.	Piece includes few if any original ideas or conclusions that are not obvious and unchallengeable; writer's work never develops intellectually over the life of the course.	Piece demonstrates willingness to push beyond the obvious and assert ideas and conclusions that compel the reader's attention; writer's work demonstrates intellectual growth over the length of the course.	1a; 2a; 3a
10. Examine personal position on a topic or a text; perform comparison of new and prior knowledge.	Piece reveals little or surface reflection of your own position; piece contains little or no attention to the implications of an observation. Reader learns little or nothing from the discussion.	Piece contains evidence of deep reflection going beyond obvious observations; reader comes away with worthwhile insight based on writer's self-reflections.	1a
11. Follow all formatting and submission guidelines.
14. Employ the tools and approaches associated with pre-writing, drafts and revision, including careful consideration of the comments by the instructor(s) and peers.	Thesis, argument and organization is unchanged from previous version; little beyond specific editing changes have been made; piece contains most or all of the errors noted by commenters.	Thesis, argument and organization have been notably improved (note that the improvements themselves do not need to meet "strong" criteria); most of the major and some of the minor suggestions have been accounted for (this may or may not include an actual changes—see NMHH, p. 93); the most significant editing errors have been fixed; most of the typographical errors have been fixed.	5

Steps to take for Composition Assignment:

Read Ch. 5 in NMHH, as assigned for Oct. 11.
Re-read the assignment carefully. If you still have any questions, please email me immediately. Remember that if you use UMail, you must type in your name or else I will not know who sent it.
Review my assessment of your first writing assignment (they will be returned online by class time, Thursday.) Check with me about any concerns you have or clarifications you need.
Download and then fill out electronically the Writing Improvement Form.
Print out a copy of the first essay and do your revision on it, and not on your computer copy. To save paper, print on two sides or on previously used (one side clear) paper.
Begin by rethinking the purpose, then the thesis. Then, reorganize your essay to support your thesis. Then, rewrite your introduction and conclusion. You may find it necessary to revisit the thesis as you progress along with your reorganization. I strongly encourage everyone to email me as they work out their thesis. NOTE: I will be out of town this weekend, so it may take up to 24 hours to respond. For that reason, do not wait until the last couple of days to email me (never a good idea anyway).
Make editing changes. Look up any sections in NMHH that need clarification, and do online exercises as needed.
Read over carefully for typographical errors (run Spell Check as a supplemental strategy) and make necessary changes.
Cut-and-paste your completed Comp Assignment Writing Improvement Form into the essay.
Submit the essay and form to Blackboard's Assignments (Composition 3) section using the Submission guidelines, by Tuesday, Oct. 16, noon (note change from usual deadline).

Online Assignment (separate from Composition this week)

Read assigned section of Kolbert, Field Notes from a Catastrophe and post one substantive "starter question" that will spark a discussion. The question must go beyond "I didn't like this" or "Why did she say that?" but should instead reveal a critical understanding of the material. The question should either extend a point you agree with in the text or challenge a point you disagree with. The question should be posted by Thursday, Oct. 11, 2pm to the Blackboard forum on Kolbert.
After class, respond to two of the questions (not including the one you posted) with substantive comments and follow up on the question you posted after at least one other student has responded. CLICK HERE for the Criteria for Assessing Online Discussion.
Post a substantive "starter question" about the assigned reading for Kolbert on Blackboard for Tuesday, Oct. 16, by 2pm.

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